Popular Movies That Stunk
Topic: Film & TV
Posted: Mon, Jun 6, 2005 
My list of popular or critically acclaimed movies that I hated... and why. Disagree? Agree? Add your own list.
- Forrest Gump - The movie that started the conservative anti-intellectual movement, when being ignorant became fashionable and learning and thinking became dirty words.
- The Piano - Please, God, let something happen in this movie. Ew, God, make him put his clothes back on! Please, God don't let anything like that happen again.
- Any Woody Allen movie with Woody Allen in the cast - I really enjoyed Bullets Over Broadway, where John Cusack did his best Allen impression, but fortunately missed the target. But any movie with Allen actually in it - yuck. I can't suspend my disbelief long enough to think that any of those leading ladies would actually be attracted to him. Surely women aren't that dumb. And the man just whines his way through every movie. Since when is that funny?
- As Good as it Gets - Why does Helen Hunt keep starring opposite men who are in no way in her same league as romantic leads? Jack Nicholson, Woody Allen, Mel Gibson; none of them look right next to her.
- True Lies - I so wanted to kick Arnold's ass for being such a sexist jerk. Come to think of it, I still do.
- Dr. T and the Women - Another completely sexist movie; I would have walked out if my friends weren't driving.
- The House of Sand and Fog - It's just a damned house, for Christ's sake. Jeez, get another one. There's no reason to kill yourself. Man. Now I want to kill myself.
- Moulin Rouge - I know I'll catch hell for listing this one, but I just couldn't get into the story for some reason. Probably because it was obvious she was going to bite the dust from the beginning. It was a beautiful visual movie, though, and I enjoyed the music.
- Pretty Woman - I really don't have to explain that one, do I?
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Comments
1. Jun 6, 05 06:17 PM | wm thompson said:
and...Mrs. Doubtfire
2. Jun 7, 05 09:16 AM | CW said:
I agree with you on Moulin Rouge. I'd like to add Titanic!!!! Leonardo and Kate seemed to have no chemistry to me. It was overly sappy as well. Blech!
3. Jun 8, 05 09:39 AM | mike said:
I'm so with you on Forrest Gump. I'd also like to nominate It's a Wonderful Life. It's not new, but like Gump, it's overrated to the point of insanity.
4. Jun 8, 05 10:12 AM | Rachel Wolfe said:
I hate It's a Wonderful Life! When that kid says "every time a bell rings..." I just want to slap her. Obnoxious brat.
5. Jun 9, 05 10:31 AM | Publius X said:
Any Michael Bay film (e.g. Armageddon)
6. Jun 13, 05 10:55 AM | Norm said:
I think the way we enjoy most movies depends on the mood we're in and what we are looking for in terms of entertainment. Sometimes a mindless comedy is better that the challenge of a complicated plot … and vise versa. While Forrest Gump may not have been the most intellectual movie of all times … it did touch a lot different subject matters that may have turned on the warm and fuzzy feelings for a lot of people. I really enjoyed the running sequence myself.
7. Jun 26, 05 06:58 PM | Melissa said:
Any movie with Tom Cruise. After all these years, I still can't bring myself to watch an entire film with him in it. Even more so lately.
8. Jun 27, 05 09:53 AM | Brent said:
I feel the same way about any movie with Renée Zellweger. I was OK with her in "Jerry Mcguire". In everything else, I find her annoying.
9. Jun 28, 05 11:31 AM | Michael Packer said:
Moulin Rouge. Yes indeed. I saw it in a packed theater and had to groan in disgust every time a pop culture reference blasted from the screen. It could have been fun and imaginative, but in an attempt to be clever while suckering people in with familiar references to popular music, it just seemed horribly lame and unoriginal.
And honestly - I was looking for a gritty historical drama. I had only vaguley seen one preview and simply had no idea.
10. Jun 29, 05 11:31 AM | Sean said:
Definitely agree with the House of Sand and Fog. The whole story seemed down right depressing and pointless. One of the few movies I had to honestly ask, "why?"
11. Jun 30, 05 04:51 PM | ratboy75 said:
I disagree with you, Brent, on Renee. I think she's quite good. The Bridget Jones movies were highly entertaining. She was also quite good in "One True Thing". I was a bit annoyed with her the first time I saw her as well...which I can't remember what movie that was now. :)
12. Jul 1, 05 09:45 AM | Rachel Wolfe said:
Any movie with Gwyneth Paltrow (who should NOT have won Best Actress that year -- Cate Blanchett deserved it for Elizabeth!). But definitely watch Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow -- not only is it a fun movie overall, but she gets suckerpunched right in the jaw! I cheered.
13. Jul 10, 05 12:37 PM | j c klee said:
i'm more inclined to think of highly overrated movies. they may not be that bad but I find all the adulation grating and excessive.
Saving Private Ryan - very simplistic. we all know what will happen. Of course it's all about "the greatest generation" and we all know they will always do "right", so why bother sitting through this thing. don't use gen X'ers/slackers have something else to do with our time?
The Big Chill - again a movie that pretends to have depth but has none, unless you're the type to consider flying off a high dive and head first into a kiddie pool. a true borefest, it's bad enough our generation gets pummeled again about another generation that was far cooler, braver, hipper than us.